Be My Valentine

The ubiquitous boxes of school valentines sat on the kitchen counter. There were four of them. A box for me, a box for my brother, a box for my sister, and one for my two younger sisters to share. They were all the same, to the chagrin of my brother who claimed they were too "girly". It was 1966, before you could choose a popular cartoon character to express your valentine sentiments to your peers. No transformers "shouting" at you to be a valentine or Sponge Bob Squarepants giggling his way through sappy sentiments. Silly puns and cute, chubby faced children adorned our cards. I did find a treasure in my box, a large valentine with a chubby faced bear stating, "I couldn't BEAR it if you won't be my valentine." It was the perfect valentine for Tony.

Tony was ten going on eleven. I had a major crush on him in 5th grade. Tony had dark hair, a wide face, and was king of the playground. I was a mousy, buck toothed, girl who was always reading. More impossible pairings have happened, but this crush was crushed by Tony's complete indifference to my existence.

Nevertheless, it was Valentine's Day and I wanted to give Tony the largest and most important Valentine in my box. I carefully laid out all the cards and handpicked one for each student in my class. It was like playing chess with valentines. The right saying had to paired with the right person. I signed my name on each valentine, except Tony's. I knew he wouldn't know if I gave him a valentine or not. But I wanted him to have my biggest and best valentine. Love makes us do stupid things! But, I wasn't a complete fool. Regardless of how much I liked Tony, I didn't like him enough to be humiliated in front of the class! The extra large valentine I was offering would be evidence of my affections. No, I had to give it to him anonymously. It was the only way to express my unrequited love without being humiliated!

I can't recall the exact details of this specific Valentine's Day. I remember pink cupcakes, red construction paper and paper doilies. I remember the teacher telling us we could open our valentines at our desks if were quiet and polite. But I remember with clarity Tony's response to my Valentine. He held it up for all to see and called across the room to his friend, "Hey Billy (yes, there really was a boy in my 5th grade class named Billy) look what I got, a Bruin valentine! I'm saving this one!" A bruin, or bear, was the mascot of the high school close to our elementary. Bruins, as the high schoolers were called were cool to Tony. So my valentine, by association, was cool to Tony. A quiet smile spread across my face.

Billy hollered back, "Who's it from?" Before the teacher could shush either one of the boys, Tony hollered, "I dunno, I'm still keeping it." My smile widened, my valentine offering had been accepted and celebrated by my true love! Mousy, insignificant me, who was crushing on the most popular boy in 5th grade, had the best Valentine's Day ever! I didn't care if he did not know who gave him his Bruin valentine. He liked it, and by association, I pretended he liked me. A good Valentine's day indeed!